Mindset Shift: How to Accept What You Can’t Change and Focus on What You Can
The other day, while touring a house with a client, a framed quote on the wall caught my eye:
“I am no longer accepting the things I cannot change. I am changing the things I cannot accept.” — Angela Y. Davis
Those words stayed with me. I turned them over in my mind, thinking about how they apply to life, mindset, and personal growth.
I’ve come to believe this statement, while powerful, isn’t applicable for all situations.
In moments when we’re stuck in procrastination, fear of the unknown, or waiting for the “perfect time”, this quote can be the jolt we need. Life is short, and time is never guaranteed. Waiting for a signal, like a referee’s whistle to start the game, can lead to missed opportunities. If you’re unhappy, restless, or unsatisfied, it’s essential to shift your mindset, take intentional action, and be sure to leave your positive imprint on the world.
But there’s another side to consider… trying to change something completely beyond our control. That feels like wasted energy to me. It seems like a frustrating path of endless circles with no end. It’s not that I don’t care, or that I won’t cheer for those who are better equipped for the task. It’s about knowing my own strengths and recognizing where my energy can have real impact.
I’ll admit, I would have loved to be an Olympic-caliber runner or an inspirationally gifted artist. But no matter how hard I trained or practiced, those particular talents weren’t mine to master. That doesn’t mean I can’t admire those who have them, or that my life lacks purpose. It simply means that I accept my limitations and choose to focus on the skills I was given.
Angela Davis, as a political activist, may have had a specific context in mind when she said these words. Through that lens, her intent was likely about confronting injustice and driving change. That matters… deeply. Even if we can’t personally lead every fight, we can still remain informed, voice our perspectives, and support those who are in a position to create positive change.
It’s okay to feel deeply about the “things you cannot change.” Acknowledge the frustration. Sit with it. Then, let go of the self-imposed burden of thinking you must fix the entire world on your own.
One person can’t change everything, but you can change something. You can focus on what you do have control over, move forward with clarity, and lead with a full heart. Trust, support, and encourage others who are fighting different battles. Keep your energy focused on the work, people, and dreams where you can truly make a difference.